My First Open Mic

My First Open Mic Video inside.



Well today was the day I had the big Open Mic Night my first I will go into detail what happened. I wrote down about eight jokes performed six, I was nervous the entire day leading up to the event. My Video guy comes to my house to damn Early, so I rush put on my clothes and run hug my grandma and tell her this is it my first open mic, she kisses me and tells me Good Luck Baby. I looked at my grandma and say “to the top because I been down for too long.”

Marz and I stop by the Mall to go loom around I then start hearing this sad church type of music so I stopped and just looked up at the sky because the mall had a skylight. It soothed me and helped me be less nervous; I had to get to the club by 6:30 to sign up for the open mic night.

Marz and I get there at five. When it is time to go into the club I meet a Comedian by the Name of Al Roads a funny guy sounds and looks very similar to Dave chappelle but has dreads and a beard. He sits me down and tells me everything I need to know about everything, don’t do this, you gotta do this, hold back on this, calm down with this, he gave me so much advice my head almost exploded.

By this time a ton of comics walk in, I mean about 20. Loud mouths, talking shit all that. Al introduces me to each one of them comics. Funny thing, everyone was talking about the Joe Rogan incident, even one of the comedians talked about it onstage when it was his time. The bartender was like ” hey ain’t you the guy that jumped on Joe Rogan back?” It was funny as hell.

So we gotta fill out our names on this piece of paper put it in a tin-can and Roach the manager, pulls out the name of the person then the person he pulled has a choice to go on show 1 show 2 or show 3. Show 3 is the worst by that time everyone leaves, it is even worse if you have the final last spot on show three.

So I look at Al and say, “I am gonna be pulled last and be the final one on show three.” He said “how do you know that?” I looked at him and said “because I got bad luck man just rotten luck.” And guess who got the final last horrible worst spot? ME!
So now, I have to sit down for three hours and watch every comedian go up, most are funny, most are horrible too. Al tells me I very may will bomb it happens to each person on his first open mic, the other comics chime in ya you gonna bomb dude.

When it was almost my time to go up, I went outside because that was where most of the comedians hung out. And I said to Al I am next, he was like kool I am gonna watch you. Then this dude chimes in, “this yo first night?”

“Yes.”

“NIGGA YOU GONNA BOMB! You ain’t gonna be funny, no possible way. You cannot come here your first night and expect to be funny, and you see the crowed in there too?”
By now there was only ten customers and like eight comedians.
The man looked at me and said, “ima go on stage before you and blow you up, no I am gonna let you go first then let you bomb then blow yo ass up again.” He left me with ” if you can make them people in their laugh fuck everything and go to LA, if you can pull this shit out yo ass the first time you go up pack and go to LA TONIGHT.” Being sarcastic ya know?

Now I am mad and nervous thinking I am gonna bomb, these are professional comedians, They know what the fuck they talking about. so when my name was called all the comedians from outside came in to look at the newb. I went on stage scared and I DESTROYED THE FUCKIN ROOM MUTHA FUCKAS!

I mean it is a blur but I was hitting them jokes, the room was real real small so I commented on it. I got my first laugh I ran with it, joke joke joke joke. I came off stage that man that was talking shit just looked at me and he said, Get yo ass to LA.
ALL THE COMEDIANS, praised me Al was in shock. He told me he never saw anything like it, to come on dead last, ten people in the room barely laughing, to make them all wake up and laugh is truly great. He praised me, the other comics was outside saying my jokes laughing. They really liked my Eight ball joke.

They rush me outside, the comedians. DAMN YOU FUNNY, HOW YOU DO THAT? Man that was funny no open mic ever did that, even the bartender was praising me. Then this dude looks at me and tells me “one month, if you can pull off what you did for one month we’ll talk about getting you some work.”
Then the comedian that was talking shit, get this. Homeboy has big contacts was on Jamie fox comedy special, knows Jamie fox, Paul Mooney worked with all them he gave me his contact card tell me to call him anytime.

Then My friend Al hands me a card tells me he inviting me to Times square a comedy club in Texas which is a big urban room, he said many contacts will be there if I can pull off what I did tonight I will be made he tells me, I got to go do that next Wednesdays.

This guy name Jim when I went into the bathroom gave me a card that allows me to perform at a college seated 4,000 kids it is a open mic as well but I get more time 7 in a half minutes.

Next week everyone tells me to come back, which I will, I can now pick the time I want to go up since I was dead last. Al tells me that I killed, that I did great, all the other comedians tells me this too, customers getting out there seats to shake my hand. I even almost got this white bitch number.